double sadness...

it was first guys... now's polo... wth... touched the ball and it still flies into the goal mouth??!! den wat's the pt of me even attempting to jump for the ball??? someone said smt tt rather pissed me off just now... damn... players can miss as many shots as they can... make as many bad passes they like... stone there and not fall back to defend etc... ppl dun reali care... but when the keeper lets in some freaking goals (like wat i did today)... well... not exactly been told off... but there's just a higher standard of expectation compared to a player missing a shot... and i dun like this feeling... oh well... though i sldnt be concerned abt such terrible remarks... i almost wanted to ............ tt person... nvm...

sigh... y must i just screw up in games... same for swimming... i always cant do mi best in competitions... it's obviously a medal swim... yet i can lose it... wth... not say i keep damn well during trg... but at least it's better this shit game i had today... andre told me we had a big gap between the 2 teams... but mi arguement was tt... he wasn't at the goal line to gif tt judgement!!! it may be just a goal to the team... another goal for the referees... but to a keeper... i am so sure it means much more... it shows ur competence... match is a time to prove urself... i got told off b4 also for not proving miself at changi naval base... sigh... ppl wun care though... jiu3 feng2 zhi1 ji3 qian1 bei1 shao3, hua4 bu4 tou2 ji1 ban4 ju4 duo1... it's hard to find someone who cares... haha... so stupid... mocking at miself...